We all require a good laugh at times. Irresistibly endearing about the elegance of a well-told “guess what” joke, a recent study of humor found.
These time-tested two-part jokes are still among the most universally popular across generations, with 78% of individuals smiling or laughing upon hearing one. Whether you’re trying to break the ice at a party, entertain children on a road trip, or inject some lighter moments into your day.
Guess what jokes provide that perfect combination of suspense and punchline that we want more of. In this ultimate guide, we’ll explore the universe of guess what jokes, list our favorites, and even assist you in creating your joke toolbox.
Clever Guess What Jokes
- Guess what? I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high; she looked shocked!
- Guess what? I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough!
- Guess what? I tried to start a gardening business. But I couldn’t find any customers to plant seeds!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a librarian. But I couldn’t keep my books in order!
- Guess what? I once got into a fight with a broken pencil; it was pointless!
- Guess what? I started a company selling land mines; it’s ground-breaking!
- Guess what? I made a pun about the ocean, but it was too deep!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a magician. But I couldn’t make my problems disappear!
- Guess what? I had a job at a calendar factory, but I got fired for taking a day off!
- Guess what? I told my computer I needed a break, and it froze!
- Guess what? I tried to catch some fog, but I missed!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a comedian. But I couldn’t find the punchline!
- Guess what? I once fought with a broken elevator; I took it to another level!
- Guess what? I thought about becoming a chef. But I couldn’t find the thyme!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a professional golfer, but kept hitting the wrong tee!
- Guess what? I made a pun about the wind, but it blows!
- Guess what? I told my friend I started a band called 999 Megabytes; we haven’t gotten a gig yet!
- Guess what? I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a professional swimmer. But I found it too draining!
- Guess what? I tried to start a professional hide-and-seek team, but it was too hard to find good players!
- Guess what? I told my cat he was adopted; now he’s plotting his revenge!
One-Liner Guess What Jokes
- Guess what? I’m on a whiskey diet—I’ve lost three days already!
- Guess what? I told my computer I needed a break, and now it won’t stop sending me beach wallpapers!
- Guess what? I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands!
- Guess what? I’m reading a book on anti-gravity; it’s impossible to put down!
- Guess what? I told my dog he was adopted; he didn’t even bark back!
- Guess what? I’m great at multitasking—I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate!
- Guess what? I just found out I’m colorblind, the diagnosis came out of purple!
- Guess what? I told my friend she drew her eyebrows too high; she looked surprised!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a baker. But I couldn’t make enough dough!
- Guess what? I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough bread!
- Guess what? My math teacher called me average; how mean!
- Guess what? I tried to catch fog yesterday; mist!
- Guess what? I named my dog “Five Miles.” I walk Five Miles!
- Guess what? I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high; she looked shocked!
- Guess what? I once fought with a broken elevator; I took it to another level!
- Guess what? I started a company selling land mines; it’s ground-breaking!
- Guess what? I asked the librarian if the library had any books on paranoia; she whispered, “They’re right behind you.”
- Guess what? I told my computer I needed a break, and now it keeps crashing!
- Guess what? I told my cat it was adopted; now he’s plotting his revenge!
- Guess what? I made a pun about the wind, but it blows!
- Guess what? I was going to tell a time travel joke, but you didn’t like it!
Funny Guess What Jokes
- Guess what? I’m on a seafood diet; I see food and eat it!
- Guess what? I used to be a banker, but I lost interest!
- Guess what? I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes; she hugged me!
- Guess what? I went to buy some camo pants, but couldn’t find any!
- Guess what? I tried to start a professional hide-and-seek team, but it was too hard to find good players!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a professional golfer, but kept hitting the wrong tee!
- Guess what? I’m reading a book on anti-gravity; it’s impossible to put down!
- Guess what? I told my computer I needed a break, and it froze!
- Guess what? I made a pun about the ocean, but it was too deep!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a librarian. But I couldn’t keep my books in order!
- Guess what? I had a job at a calendar factory, but I got fired for taking a day off!
- Guess what? I told my friend I’m starting a band called 999 Megabytes; we haven’t gotten a gig yet!
- Guess what? I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough!
- Guess what? I told my cat he was adopted; now he’s plotting his revenge!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a comedian. But I couldn’t find the punchline!
- Guess what? I used to be a professional swimmer, but I found it too draining!
- Guess what? I wanted to be an astronaut, but I couldn’t find space!
- Guess what? I tried to start a gardening business. But I couldn’t find any customers to plant seeds!
- Guess what? I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough!
- Guess what? I thought about becoming a magician. But I couldn’t make my problems disappear!
- Guess what? I was going to tell a joke about pizza. But it’s just too cheesy!
Q&A Guess What Jokes
- Q: Guess what? Why did the scarecrow win an award?
A: Because he was outstanding in his field! - Q: Guess what? What do you call fake spaghetti?
A: An impasta! - Q: Guess what? Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
A: They don’t have the guts! - Q: Guess what? Why was the math book sad?
A: Because it had too many problems! - Q: Guess what? What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
A: Nacho cheese! - Q: Guess what? Why did the bicycle fall over?
A: It was two-tiered! - Q: Guess what? What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A: A gummy bear! - Q: Guess what? Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
A: In case he got a hole-in-one! - Q: Guess what? What did one wall say to the other wall?
A: I’ll meet you at the corner! - Q: Guess what? Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
A: Because it felt crummy! - Q: Guess what? How does a penguin build its house?
A: Igloos it together! - Q: Guess what? What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A: Fsh! - Q: Guess what? Why did the computer go to the doctor?
A: Because it had a virus! - Q: Guess what? What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
A: Frostbite! - Q: Guess what? Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
A: Because she will let it go! - Q: Guess what? What do you call an alligator in a vest?
A: An investigator! - Q: Guess what? Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
A: Because they make up everything! - Q: Guess what? What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
A: Supplies! - Q: Guess what? What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A: A carrot! - Q: Guess what? Why did the music teacher go to jail?
A: Because she got caught with too many sharp notes!
Best Guess What Jokes
- Guess what? I was going to tell a joke about time travel, but you didn’t like it!
- Guess what? I once fought with a broken elevator; I took it to another level!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a banker, but I lost interest!
- Guess what? I told my computer I needed a break, and now it keeps crashing!
- Guess what? I tried to catch some fog, but I missed!
- Guess what? I told my friend she drew her eyebrows too high; she looked surprised!
- Guess what? I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough!
- Guess what? I started a company selling land mines; it’s ground-breaking!
- Guess what? I made a pun about the wind, but it blows!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a librarian. But I couldn’t keep my books in order!
- Guess what? I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands!
- Guess what? I tried to start a professional hide-and-seek team, but it was too hard to find good players!
- Guess what? I was going to tell a joke about pizza. But it’s just too cheesy!
- Guess what? I once got into a fight with a broken pencil; it was pointless!
- Guess what? I had a job at a calendar factory, but I got fired for taking a day off!
- Guess what? I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes; she hugged me!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a professional golfer, but kept hitting the wrong tee!
- Guess what? I thought about becoming a magician. But I couldn’t make my problems disappear!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a comedian. But I couldn’t find the punchline!
- Guess what? I’m reading a book on anti-gravity; it’s impossible to put down.
Silly Guess What Jokes
- Guess what? I told my cat he was adopted; now he thinks he’s royalty!
- Guess what? I tried to start a band called “1023 MB”; we haven’t gotten a gig yet!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a baker. But I couldn’t find the dough!
- Guess what? I made a pun about the alphabet, but it was too lettered!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a gardener. But I couldn’t find my roots!
- Guess what? I told my friend I was going to start a bakery. He said I kneaded it!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a scientist. But I couldn’t find the right chemistry!
- Guess what? I told my plant it was adopted; now it’s thriving!
- Guess what? I tried to play hide-and-seek with my furniture, but it always hides too well!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a musician. But I couldn’t find my rhythm!
- Guess what? I tried to take a selfie with my food, but it kept getting eaten!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a comedian, but my jokes fell flat!
- Guess what? I tried to catch a squirrel; it was too nutty for me!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a magician. But my tricks were a little too obvious!
- Guess what? I tried to make a pun about cheese, but it was too gouda!
- Guess what? I told my dog he was adopted; he just wagged his tail!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a chef. But I couldn’t find my spice!
- Guess what? I tried to write a joke about construction, but I’m still working on it!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a painter. But I couldn’t find my canvas!
- Guess what? I told my friend I was starting a seafood restaurant; he said I was just fishing for compliments!
- Guess what? I tried to teach my goldfish to swim in circles, but it was a little fishy!
Kids Guess What Jokes
- Guess what? Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
A: Because it was already stuffed! - Guess what? What did the big flower say to the little flower?
A: “Hey, bud!” - Guess what? Why did the student eat his homework?
A: Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake! - Guess what? What do you call a sleeping bull?
A: A bulldozer! - Guess what? Why did the banana go to the doctor?
A: Because it wasn’t peeling well! - Guess what? What do you call a fish that wears a bowtie?
A: Sophisticated! - Guess what? Why did the cookie cry?
A: Because it felt crummy! - Guess what? What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A: A thesaurus! - Guess what? Why was the math book sad?
A: Because it had too many problems! - Guess what? What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A: Frostbite! - Guess what? Why did the computer go to the doctor?
A: Because it had a virus! - Guess what? What did one wall say to the other wall?
A: “I’ll meet you at the corner!” - Guess what? Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
A: Because they make up everything! - Guess what? What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A: A gummy bear! - Guess what? Why did the bicycle fall over?
A: Because it was two-tiered! - Guess what? What did the ocean say to the beach?
A: Nothing, it just waved! - Guess what? Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
A: In case he got a hole-in-one! - Guess what? What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
A: Nacho cheese! - Guess what? Why did the mushroom go to the party?
A: Because he was a fungus! - Guess what? What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
A: Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Short Guess What Jokes
- Guess what? I told my cat he was adopted; now he’s my assistant!
- Guess what? I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a gardener. But I couldn’t find my roots!
- Guess what? I tried to make a pun about pizza, but it was too cheesy!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a chef. But I couldn’t find my thyme!
- Guess what? I tried to start a band called “1023 MB”; we haven’t gotten a gig yet!
- Guess what? I told my friend I was going to start a bakery. He said I kneaded it!
- Guess what? I once got into a fight with a broken pencil; it was pointless!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a magician, but my tricks were too obvious!
- Guess what? I tried to take a selfie with my food, but it kept getting eaten!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a musician. But I couldn’t find my rhythm!
- Guess what? I tried to catch a squirrel; it was too nutty for me!
- Guess what? I told my dog he was adopted; he just wagged his tail!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a painter. But I couldn’t find my canvas!
- Guess what? I told my friend I was starting a seafood restaurant; he said I was just fishing for compliments!
- Guess what? I tried to teach my goldfish to swim in circles, but it was a little fishy!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a scientist. But I couldn’t find the right chemistry!
- Guess what? I told my plant it was adopted; now it’s thriving!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a comedian, but my jokes fell flat!
- Guess what? I tried to write a joke about construction, but I’m still working on it!
Creative Guess What Jokes
- Guess what? I told my computer I needed a break, and now it keeps sending me vacation ads!
- Guess what? I tried to write a joke about time travel, but you didn’t like it!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a chef. But I couldn’t find the right recipe!
- Guess what? I started a new job as a professional napper; it’s a dream come true!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a gardener. But I couldn’t find my green thumb!
- Guess what? I tried to make a pun about gardening. But it just didn’t grow on me!
- Guess what? I once got into a debate with a broken clock; it was pointless!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a magician. But I couldn’t find my wand!
- Guess what? I told my friend I was starting a rock band; he said I was just a pebble!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a photographer. But I couldn’t find the right focus!
- Guess what? I tried to catch some clouds, but they were too fluffy!
- Guess what? I wanted to be an astronaut. But I couldn’t find my space suit!
- Guess what? I told my dog he was adopted; now he thinks he’s a superstar!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a poet. But I couldn’t find the right rhyme!
- Guess what? I tried to start a band called “1010 MB”; we haven’t gotten a gig yet!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a cartoonist. But I couldn’t draw a crowd!
- Guess what? I tried to write a joke about pizza, but it was too cheesy!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a detective. But I couldn’t find the clues!
- Guess what? I tried to take a selfie with my breakfast, but it got eaten first!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a writer, but I couldn’t find my plot!
- Guess what? I told my cat he was adopted; now he thinks he’s royalty!
Lighthearted Guess What Jokes
- Guess what? I told my friend I’m starting a bakery; he said I kneaded it!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a gardener. But I couldn’t find my roots!
- Guess what? I tried to play hide-and-seek with my furniture, but it always hides too well!
- Guess what? I told my dog he was adopted; now he thinks he’s a superstar!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a magician, but my tricks were too obvious!
- Guess what? I once got into a fight with a broken pencil; it was pointless!
- Guess what? I tried to catch a squirrel; it was too nutty for me!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a chef. But I couldn’t find my thyme!
- Guess what? I made a pun about the alphabet, but it was too lettered!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a musician. But I couldn’t find my rhythm!
- Guess what? I told my cat he was adopted; now he’s my assistant!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a painter. But I couldn’t find my canvas!
- Guess what? I tried to take a selfie with my food, but it kept getting eaten!
- Guess what? I told my plant it was adopted; now it’s thriving!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a comedian, but my jokes fell flat!
- Guess what? I tried to write a joke about construction, but I’m still working on it!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a scientist. But I couldn’t find the right chemistry!
- Guess what? I tried to make a pun about cheese, but it was too gouda!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a librarian. But I couldn’t keep my books in order!
- Guess what? I told my friend I was starting a seafood restaurant; he said I was just fishing for compliments!
Classic Guess What Jokes
- Guess what? Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To get to the other side! - Guess what? What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
A: Nothing, they just waved! - Guess what? Why did the tomato turn red?
A: Because it saw the salad dressing! - Guess what? What do you call a bear with no ears?
A: B! - Guess what? Why was the broom late?
A: It swept in! - Guess what? What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
A: Supplies! - Guess what? Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
A: In case he got a hole-in-one! - Guess what? What do you call a fake noodle?
A: An impasta! - Guess what? Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
A: Because they make up everything! - Guess what? What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
A: Frostbite! - Guess what? Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
A: Because it felt crummy! - Guess what? What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
A: Nacho cheese! - Guess what? Why did the bicycle fall over?
A: Because it was two-tiered! - Guess what? What do you call a fish without eyes?
A: Fsh! - Guess what? Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
A: They don’t have the guts! - Guess what? What did the big flower say to the little flower?
A: “Hey, bud!” - Guess what? Why did the scarecrow win an award?
A: Because he was outstanding in his field! - Guess what? Why did the music teacher go to jail?
A: Because she got caught with too many sharp notes! - Guess what? What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A: A thesaurus! - Guess what? Why did the student eat his homework?
A: Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
Unique Guess What Jokes
- Guess what? I told my friend I was going to start a bakery. He said I kneaded it!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a gardener. But I couldn’t find my green thumb!
- Guess what? I tried to make a pun about gardening. But it just didn’t grow on me!
- Guess what? I once got into a debate with a broken clock; it was pointless!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a magician. But I couldn’t find my wand!
- Guess what? I told my dog he was adopted; now he thinks he’s a superstar!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a poet. But I couldn’t find the right rhyme!
- Guess what? I tried to start a band called “1010 MB”; we haven’t gotten a gig yet!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a cartoonist. But I couldn’t draw a crowd!
- Guess what? I tried to write a joke about pizza, but it was too cheesy!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a detective. But I couldn’t find the clues!
- Guess what? I tried to take a selfie with my breakfast, but it got eaten first!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a writer, but I couldn’t find my plot!
- Guess what? I told my cat he was adopted; now he thinks he’s royalty!
- Guess what? I tried to make a pun about coffee, but it was too brewed to be true!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a scientist. But I couldn’t find the right chemistry!
- Guess what? I told my computer I needed a break; now it’s sending me vacation ads!
- Guess what? I started a new hobby making puns; it’s pun-derful!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a photographer. But I couldn’t find the right focus!
- Guess what? I tried to catch a cloud, but it was too fluffy!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a chef. But I couldn’t find the right recipe!
New Guess What Jokes
- Guess what? I started a new job as a professional sleeper; it’s a dream come true!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a chef. But I couldn’t find the right recipe!
- Guess what? I tried to make a pun about gardening. But it just didn’t grow on me!
- Guess what? I once got into a debate with a broken clock; it was pointless!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a magician. But I couldn’t find my wand!
- Guess what? I told my friend I was starting a rock band; he said I was just a pebble!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a photographer. But I couldn’t find the right focus!
- Guess what? I tried to catch some clouds, but they were too fluffy!
- Guess what? I wanted to be an astronaut. But I couldn’t find my space suit!
- Guess what? I told my dog he was adopted; now he thinks he’s a superstar!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a poet. But I couldn’t find the right rhyme!
- Guess what? I tried to start a band called “1010 MB”; we haven’t gotten a gig yet!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a cartoonist. But I couldn’t draw a crowd!
- Guess what? I tried to write a joke about pizza, but it was too cheesy!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a detective. But I couldn’t find the clues!
- Guess what? I tried to take a selfie with my breakfast, but it got eaten first!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a writer, but I couldn’t find my plot!
- Guess what? I told my cat he was adopted; now he thinks he’s royalty!
- Guess what? I tried to make a pun about coffee, but it was too brewed to be true!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a scientist. But I couldn’t find the right chemistry!
- Guess what? I told my computer I needed a break; now it’s sending me vacation ads!
Hilarious Guess What Jokes
- Guess what? I told my computer I needed a break, and now it keeps sending me vacation ads!
- Guess what? I tried to write a joke about time travel, but you didn’t like it!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a chef. But I couldn’t find the right recipe!
- Guess what? I started a new job as a professional napper; it’s a dream come true!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a gardener. Butt I couldn’t find my green thumb!
- Guess what? I tried to make a pun about gardening. But it just didn’t grow on me!
- Guess what? I once got into a debate with a broken clock; it was pointless!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a magician. But I couldn’t find my wand!
- Guess what? I told my friend I was starting a rock band; he said I was just a pebble!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a photographer. But I couldn’t find the right focus!
- Guess what? I tried to catch some clouds, but they were too fluffy!
- Guess what? I wanted to be an astronaut. But I couldn’t find my space suit!
- Guess what? I told my dog he was adopted; now he thinks he’s a superstar!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a poet. But I couldn’t find the right rhyme!
- Guess what? I tried to start a band called “1010 MB”; we haven’t gotten a gig yet!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a cartoonist. But I couldn’t draw a crowd!
- Guess what? I tried to write a joke about pizza, but it was too cheesy!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a detective. But I couldn’t find the clues!
- Guess what? I tried to take a selfie with my breakfast, but it got eaten first!
- Guess what? I wanted to be a writer, but I couldn’t find my plot!
- Guess what? I told my cat he was adopted; now he thinks he’s royalty!
Easy Guess What Jokes
- Guess what? Why did the computer go to the doctor?
A: Because it had a virus! - Guess what? Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
A: Because it felt crummy! - Guess what? Why did the banana go to the doctor?
A: Because it wasn’t peeling well! - Guess what? What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A: A gummy bear! - Guess what? What did the ocean say to the beach?
A: Nothing, it just waved! - Guess what? Why was the broom late?
A: It swept in! - Guess what? What do you call a fake noodle?
A: An impasta! - Guess what? Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
A: In case he got a hole-in-one! - Guess what? Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
A: They don’t have the guts! - Guess what? What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
A: Nacho cheese! - Guess what? Why did the bicycle fall over?
A: Because it was two-tiered! - Guess what? What do you call a fish without eyes?
A: Fsh! - Guess what? What did one wall say to the other wall?
A: “I’ll meet you at the corner!” - Guess what? What did the big flower say to the little flower?
A: “Hey, bud!” - Guess what? Why did the scarecrow win an award?
A: Because he was outstanding in his field! - Guess what? Why did the student eat his homework?
A: Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake! - Guess what? What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
A: Frostbite! - Guess what? Why did the tomato turn red?
A: Because it saw the salad dressing! - Guess what? Why did the mushroom go to the party?
A: Because he was a fungus! - Guess what? What do you call an alligator in a vest?
A: An investigator!
Conclusion
There you have all you need to know about what jokes are and a collection of examples you can use to keep people in stitches. From parents wanting to entertain their children, through teachers seeking ice-breakers for the classroom, to everyone who enjoys the simple pleasure of a good joke, guess what jokes provide that ideal combination of interaction and humor.
These jokes are so wonderful because they are so easy to tell to anyone. They usually lead to a joke chain reaction once you begin. The next time you’re stuck in an awkward moment or need to brighten up someone’s day, don’t forget to use those two magical words: “Guess what?” Trust me, the ensuing laughter will be worth it.
